Dang
You don't need to be able to read German to know what they are saying:
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CURRENT: 2020 G20 M340 xDrive — Carbahn Tune
RETIRED: 2011 E90 335i xDrive — Cobb AP3, PE Exhaust, Alpina TCU Flash, VRSF Charge Pipe
2017 Estoril Blue X1 M Sport — JB4