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      08-26-2015, 06:41 PM   #1
mccannable
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Am I being too paranoid?

My wife started a photography business earlier this year. 99% of her clients are kids, teens, and families. She has now started getting into weddings.

This week she got contacted by a potential client for a wedding. The brides father is paying and apparently setting most of it up. It's at his property. He and my wife talked on the phone and she set an appointment for a consultation with him and his wife and to see the venue/property.

My wife said he sounded a bit drunk when the spoke on the phone. I was raised fairly paranoid too. I find myself worried sometimes that this is a set up. She has her personal Facebook locked down and only a headshot visible with no pictures of herself on her business page.

I'm I being paranoid or am I right to worry about meeting like these?


to,dr wife has business i worry about her getting raped.
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      08-26-2015, 06:48 PM   #2
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that's not being paranoid. Sounds like just being cautious, which you should be. I would be. Having your wife going to meet someone you guys don't know at some place you're not choosing - I wouldn't want her going unless you go with her AND tell others where you will be. Or, first you both meet them in a public place to talk and get to know them.
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      08-26-2015, 06:52 PM   #3
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Statistically serial rapists of an older age prefer to commit these offences further away from home, so I don't think she's going to get raped in his house. Pepper spray and stuns guns are legal in Florida no? Just in case.
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      08-26-2015, 07:04 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mleun481 View Post
that's not being paranoid. Sounds like just being cautious, which you should be. I would be. Having your wife going to meet someone you guys don't know at some place you're not choosing - I wouldn't want her going unless you go with her AND tell others where you will be. Or, first you both meet them in a public place to talk and get to know them.
That's what I have always kinda of thought, but that would stifle her business. Then again, so would being murdered.




It's Florida, everything's legal(weapons).
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      08-26-2015, 07:16 PM   #5
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Yes, that's a decision you guys will have make - what risks you're willing to take for the business.
Don't want to start a gun debate - to me, gun laws are only good if you follow them. Gun laws in NYC are pretty strict, but criminals don't really care. We have all kinds of crime here.
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      08-26-2015, 07:22 PM   #6
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Yea. We aren't gun people. Not a political thing. I would rather not have to be in a situation where we would need one.
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      08-26-2015, 08:35 PM   #7
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She should bring someone with her, just to be safe. She should always trust her gut.
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      08-26-2015, 09:42 PM   #8
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I wasn't even a little bit drunk during that phone call. Calm down.



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      08-26-2015, 10:02 PM   #9
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not long ago...a Realtor was killed in FL when she met a man to show a house...

Be Careful!!
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      08-26-2015, 10:03 PM   #10
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I sometimes worry about my wife getting raped in similar situations, then i remember it's near impossible for me to tap it and she kinda likes me. Good luck to anyone else.
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      08-26-2015, 10:19 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by csu87
I sometimes worry about my wife getting raped in similar situations, then i remember it's near impossible for me to tap it and she kinda likes me. Good luck to anyone else.
You sir- are in need of a trip to the good ol Hong Kong Gentlemans Club in sunny Tijuana
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      08-27-2015, 12:14 AM   #12
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"I'm taking off for two weeks. Enjoy running the family life"

"K"

...

"I'm back. "

"so, what did you this time?"

"I drove through Canada all the way to get to Detroit, I had a fuck load of fun there and a cop told me to be kind to the locals since I am the antichrist, then I went to biker bar for a pint. Nice chaps. Then I drove to NJ, hung out with old and new friends, I drove through Wyoming again and fml I had fun"

"k. Any issues?"

"car went Christmas tree on three occasions, a few (I do lie to him at times) cop encounters, nothing major."

"k. So your usual road trip?"

"yeah"
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      08-27-2015, 12:58 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
"I'm taking off for two weeks. Enjoy running the family life"

"K"

...

"I'm back. "

"so, what did you this time?"

"I drove through Canada all the way to get to Detroit, I had a fuck load of fun there and a cop told me to be kind to the locals since I am the antichrist, then I went to biker bar for a pint. Nice chaps. Then I drove to NJ, hung out with old and new friends, I drove through Wyoming again and fml I had fun"

"k. Any issues?"

"car went Christmas tree on three occasions, a few (I do lie to him at times) cop encounters, nothing major."

"k. So your usual road trip?"

"yeah"
Leaving out hitchhikers, truck drivers, stranded travelers, and random characters you met on the road?
Read this ones road trip stories and you won't feel so worried.
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      08-27-2015, 01:04 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mccannable View Post
My wife started a photography business earlier this year. 99% of her clients are kids, teens, and families. She has now started getting into weddings.

This week she got contacted by a potential client for a wedding. The brides father is paying and apparently setting most of it up. It's at his property. He and my wife talked on the phone and she set an appointment for a consultation with him and his wife and to see the venue/property.

My wife said he sounded a bit drunk when the spoke on the phone. I was raised fairly paranoid too. I find myself worried sometimes that this is a set up. She has her personal Facebook locked down and only a headshot visible with no pictures of herself on her business page.

I'm I being paranoid or am I right to worry about meeting like these?


to,dr wife has business i worry about her getting raped.
You are not being paranoid at all.
I live in very very safe neighborhood, and I carry OC and CCW.

If I feel little threatened or have just random threat, I will carry CCW, OC, EDW, and 12GA.

If I have specific threat, I will carry PDW, CCW, OC, EDW, and with Bugout bag. I will wear at least Level II (or higher).

Gotta be able to perform +1 than a bad guy. ALWAYS.
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      08-27-2015, 01:13 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wah View Post
Leaving out hitchhikers, truck drivers, stranded travelers, and random characters you met on the road?
Read this ones road trip stories and you won't feel so worried.
Oh come on, gimme some credit too...

I'm a product of a world where being fearless gets you everything. I know you guys wait for the bad shit where as i go and find it and then write about it.


I'm just saying that instead of making the wife feel afraid, make her feel like taking on the world. Works for me every time.
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      08-27-2015, 01:23 AM   #16
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Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Oh come on, gimme some credit too...

I'm a product of a world where being fearless gets you everything. I know you guys wait for the bad shit where as i go and find it and then write about it.


I'm just saying that instead of making the wife feel afraid, make her feel like taking on the world. Works for me every time.
Well my point is that all these things are normally considered dangerous and situations to avoid... Yet somehow you come out of them with new friends. Lol...
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      08-27-2015, 01:57 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wah View Post
Well my point is that all these things are normally considered dangerous and situations to avoid... Yet somehow you come out of them with new friends. Lol...
Again, I've been trained to examine every confrontation as an individual one and not to knit them together as the same old story. Also, my spouse knows I seek out trouble and find it often.

Back home our neighbors showed up to our lawn every Saturday night to watch me trying to kick him down. He has abt 60lbs on me, so usually I got a good hit, a kick, maybe one halfass take down in before I went down.

My point is that instead of him telling me to be scared, he spent years making sure I know how not to be taken down. How not to be the victim.

World is not safe but statistics show its not worse than it was. We are not delicate flowers and no man approaches me with bad intentions since I give out a vibe of not needing to give a shit.

In the last year doing what I do I've gotten a few hits before ive acted, but all in all I've never been afraid. Being scared is the poison of our society and I truly hope you all wouldn't feed into it.

I'm a mom and I truly have reasons to live for, I just don't let fears control me.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      08-27-2015, 03:26 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mccannable View Post
My wife started a photography business earlier this year. 99% of her clients are kids, teens, and families. She has now started getting into weddings.

This week she got contacted by a potential client for a wedding. The brides father is paying and apparently setting most of it up. It's at his property. He and my wife talked on the phone and she set an appointment for a consultation with him and his wife and to see the venue/property.

My wife said he sounded a bit drunk when the spoke on the phone. I was raised fairly paranoid too. I find myself worried sometimes that this is a set up. She has her personal Facebook locked down and only a headshot visible with no pictures of herself on her business page.

I'm I being paranoid or am I right to worry about meeting like these?


to,dr wife has business i worry about her getting raped.
Frankly, what you describe above reads to me like just a variation on worrying about getting hit by a bus on busy city streets. One can worry about that sort of thing, and in response, one can take reasonable actions to avoid getting hit by a bus. Those actions can include never venturing outside of a space that is impenetrable by buses. If one can happily live their life that way, buy all means do.

Red:
Nobody can say you are wrong or right to worry. One worries about whatever they worry about with regard to those about whom they care. There is no single thing that you or your wife are going to be aware of -- other than that a person is a convicted and released rapist, and to know that you'll need to do a background check -- that's going to legitimately predict what personal safety risks your wife's customers pose.

What you and she can do to minimize the risks is control and structure the circumstances under which she meets with customers or potential customers so that they are as safe as possible.


Blue:
Do you see over yonder, friend Sancho, thirty or forty hulking giants?
-- Miguel de Cervantes, Don Quixote

You're being paranoid.

Rape is not something that happens because the victim is "hot." Men do not rape women for sex. A rapist gets satisfaction by humiliating and controlling his victim and uses sex as the tool to do this.

I think if rape is what concerns you, you should endeavor to learn about what type of crime rape is rather than "seeing" potential rapists around every corner.

Orange:
Millions of people get drunk every day and don't rape anybody. Millions of people get drunk and don't even consider raping someone. Inebriation does not cause rape.

All the best.
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      08-27-2015, 07:03 AM   #19
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Thanks for all the feedback.

Lups, I didn't realize you were a woman till later in your posts.

My sister, similar size to wife, did family counseling for dcf in ghettos all across Florida for a few years. Always alone, never seemed to worry her or her husband. Although it worried my parents sick.
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      08-27-2015, 08:44 AM   #20
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Follow you intuition....and if it's wrong trust someone that has better.
Based on what I just read sounds like you are a protective mate and maybe being a touch paranoid I think.
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      08-27-2015, 09:52 AM   #21
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Well, I always meet my CL deals in a public place. I would never enter a stranger's home (alone). I think it's reasonable for her to bring someone along, considering it is not a public venue.
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      08-27-2015, 09:54 AM   #22
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Sounds like a good basis for some kinky role playing. . .

Lups you are that statistical anomaly so far outside of the curve that you aren't even to be considered in the discussion, although I am extremely proud of knowing you and your outlook on life, being to be lived.

It IS all about attitude. I live "in 'da hood" and am pretty fair skinned Irish/German. Yet I don't lock my doors, walk down to the corner store day or night, and regularly yell at speeders or those breaking the law by working on their cars in the street. 17 years and nobody has fucked with me. Neighbors park their cars in front of my house because they feel safer there than in front of their own damn house.
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