Help me on breaking up

John 070 · 02-22-2016, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Get it right Sara. This type of behavior makes a man cool and manly - it makes a woman nasty and gross. Sheesh. You need more social programming. Go watch some more 70s/80s TV shows.

Not really....but what I am saying is let's say you're an introvert, and you've only dated 3 people in your whole life. What are the chances that of those 3, one is "the" right person? Slim, to none.

Yes, there is a double-standard, but let's be clear, my dad said to date, he didn't say to sleep with, and date is exactly what he meant.

If I had a daughter, I'd give her the same advice. You can't possibly meet the right guy if you only have dated 3 people. But, the overall feeling is, yes, different, with a son, and a daughter. I only have the former.

yas_e92 · 02-22-2016, 12:33 PM

bro youll do so much better without her. youll find someone that'll actually care for you and not go running off to other dudes when the smallest thing goes wrong. you'll meet someone LOYAL.

you keep thinking about who shes on a date with? lol shes probably cheating on that dude too man..

deff seen more guys trying to oppress their partner restricting them from engaging in any kind of activity with other genders. In your situation probably cause she cheated on you... but this deff drives them away they need some space.

Theres places in the word where its the LAW to marry two females because there are way too many females... i think you can find another ONE

Whostheboss · 02-22-2016, 12:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by C5driver

You just described a BMW meet

ETA:

Hahahahaha

smoosh · 02-22-2016, 12:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChicagoBimmers

deff seen more guys trying to oppress their partner restricting them from engaging in any kind of activity with other genders. In your situation probably cause she cheated on you... but this deff drives them away they need some space.

thanks for the advice brotha

this is one thing that I kept thinking about. I tried my best not to restrict her in any way because of what she did, but sometimes it just happens subconsciously.

if there's one thing about her, she loves to love haha. she wanted to spend a lot of time together, and I didn't necessarily dislike that, but it was starting to get overbearing. she'd want to talk on the phone 3-4 times a day, text throughout the day...which meant that I had to basically live by my phone. Before that, I hardly ever got to my phone, only three times a day to check texts. And now...I don't text or call her, so zero texts. trying to text old friends and catch up with them, see how they're doing.

fuck I hate phones and social media

Verbiage · 02-22-2016, 12:59 PM

Did you ever tell her that you didn't like talking on the phone so often?

Communication, communication, communication.....pun intended.

smoosh · 02-22-2016, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Did you ever tell her that you didn't like talking on the phone so often?

Communication, communication, communication.....pun intended.

I didn't, no. absolutely should have. she wanted to spend 100% of her time with me, and I didn't. I had to work, and didn't have much time mon-fri. the more time I started to spend with her, the more we started calling and texting.

Verbiage · 02-22-2016, 01:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by smoosh

I didn't, no. absolutely should have. she wanted to spend 100% of her time with me, and I didn't. I had to work, and didn't have much time mon-fri. the more time I started to spend with her, the more we started calling and texting.

Did she have a close relationship with her father, or no relationship? Perhaps you were "daddy".

You know, things are starting to make sense with your story. Perhaps part of her cheating comes from the consistent need for physical and emotional validation that you were not always able/willing to provide. If she is dependent on you for those types of things, she will absolutely go elsewhere if you are not on good terms.

It's almost like forcing an addict to go cold turkey. 99% of the time, it ain't gonna happen.

M3 Number 86 · 02-22-2016, 01:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by smoosh

I didn't, no. absolutely should have. she wanted to spend 100% of her time with me, and I didn't. I had to work, and didn't have much time mon-fri. the more time I started to spend with her, the more we started calling and texting.

What is this? Are you justifying or second guessing your actions now?
She's a skank. You like other people's dick taste in your mouth?

Cmon man get a grip. This is getting pathetic.

jtodd_fl · 02-22-2016, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by smoosh

I didn't, no. absolutely should have. she wanted to spend 100% of her time with me, and I didn't. I had to work, and didn't have much time mon-fri. the more time I started to spend with her, the more we started calling and texting.

Well, not 100%, obviously. Ooh... I'm sorry - too soon?

Verbiage · 02-22-2016, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by M3 Number 86

What is this? Are you justifying or second guessing your actions now?
She's a skank. You like other people's dick taste in your mouth?

Cmon man get a grip. This is getting pathetic.

He's venting. Lol, everyone handles shit differently. Not everyone is made of sex appeal and chocolate like me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Well, not 100%, obviously. Ooh... I'm sorry - too soon?

smoosh · 02-22-2016, 01:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Did she have a close relationship with her father, or no relationship? Perhaps you were "daddy".

You know, things are starting to make sense with your story. Perhaps part of her cheating comes from the consistent need for physical and emotional validation that you were not always able/willing to provide. If she is dependent on you for those types of things, she will absolutely go elsewhere if you are not on good terms.

It's almost like forcing an addict to go cold turkey. 99% of the time, it ain't gonna happen.

she did have a close relationship with her father. no family issues whatsoever.

she was very dependent on me for physical and emotional validation. she had some pretty bad self-esteem issues. she spent about 60% of our time physically together on facebook, comparing herself to other girls constantly. I know many girls do that, but this was just over the top. constantly telling me how she wants to lost weight [was already slightly underweight], how she got stuck in the ugly sorority in undergrad, how every girl in her undergrad school was better looking than her, etc. not a lot of confidence in herself, so she looked towards me to give her confidence and esteem.

Quote:

Originally Posted by M3 Number 86

What is this? Are you justifying or second guessing your actions now?
She's a skank. You like other people's dick taste in your mouth?

Cmon man get a grip. This is getting pathetic.

absolutely not second guessing or justifying my actions man haha. just explaining/discussing/venting/learning/getting insight.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

Well, not 100%, obviously. Ooh... I'm sorry - too soon?

hahahah!! doesn't bother me like the way it used to anymore

as bitch as it sounds, I more just miss passing time with her on weekends, or simply calling her every night.

and sex haha. but I'm controlling that urge pretty well.

Sara · 02-22-2016, 01:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by M3 Number 86

What is this? Are you justifying or second guessing your actions now?
She's a skank. You like other people's dick taste in your mouth?

Cmon man get a grip. This is getting pathetic.

Im sure she bathes before she has sex with him.

M3 Number 86 · 02-22-2016, 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by smoosh

she did have a close relationship with her father. no family issues whatsoever.

she was very dependent on me for physical and emotional validation. she had some pretty bad self-esteem issues. she spent about 60% of our time physically together on facebook, comparing herself to other girls constantly. I know many girls do that, but this was just over the top. constantly telling me how she wants to lost weight [was already slightly underweight], how she got stuck in the ugly sorority in undergrad, how every girl in her undergrad school was better looking than her, etc. not a lot of confidence in herself, so she looked towards me to give her confidence and esteem.

absolutely not second guessing or justifying my actions man haha. just explaining/discussing/venting/learning/getting insight.

hahahah!! doesn't bother me like the way it used to anymore

as bitch as it sounds, I more just miss passing time with her on weekends, or simply calling her every night.

and sex haha. but I'm controlling that urge pretty well.

Don't be a bitch about it! Stop talking about it. Think negative thoughts.

Like I said before, if anything, if you are strong enough to resist the urge to save her, you can at least turn the tables on her and start using her physically and give NOTHING ELSE.

Verbiage · 02-22-2016, 01:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by smoosh

she did have a close relationship with her father. no family issues whatsoever.

she was very dependent on me for physical and emotional validation. she had some pretty bad self-esteem issues. she spent about 60% of our time physically together on facebook, comparing herself to other girls constantly. I know many girls do that, but this was just over the top. constantly telling me how she wants to lost weight [was already slightly underweight], how she got stuck in the ugly sorority in undergrad, how every girl in her undergrad school was better looking than her, etc. not a lot of confidence in herself, so she looked towards me to give her confidence and esteem.

All this, and you left her.

Just kidding. Yeah that sounds tough.

CANGRKE70 · 02-22-2016, 01:38 PM

Hey OP, hang in there man.

You've been in a relationship with this slag for 1.5 years on and off...so I'm going to make some assumptions here so bare with me...

1. You got comfortable fat. (maybe a pound here or there) Go to the gym...new chicks like nothing better than a fit guy and it's also a great way to release tension and promote endorphin release, which will make you feel better.

2. Your GF was a Ho, your friends kept telling you and you proceeded to still ditch them for said Ho. Time to reconnect. Ask your friends out to a bar. Apologize...buy them copious amounts of beers. The true friends will forgive you.

3. Go on a trip. Like a drug addict needs to change scenery to get away from bad influences and enablers you need to do the same. Where have you always wanted to go? Ask a friend to go with...if not go by yourself. Explore the shit out of that place, go to bar/club and get just let go of the negativity this "women" brought upon you. Hopefully you meet someone...Italy has so many hot women.

4. Cut her off like cancer. If you take her call, msg her back, check her social media you are going to start gravitating towards her. Lance that bitch off like a pus filled boil. She is toxic, has eaten more cock than a Kardashian and you shouldn't even spend another second of your life trying to mend a relationship that will never be there.

Hope this helps.

Best of luck man.

Verbiage · 02-22-2016, 01:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sara504

Im sure she bathes before she has sex with him.

But what if she didn't and they had secondhand smelly sex and OP just isn't saying that?

M3 Number 86 · 02-22-2016, 01:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sara504

Im sure she bathes before she has sex with him.

with a girl like that you can't take risks. Not sure if colgate gets rid of dick.

Axius · 02-22-2016, 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by smoosh

as bitch as it sounds, I more just miss passing time with her on weekends, or simply calling her every night.

and sex haha. but I'm controlling that urge pretty well.

Well stop. Go make your own memories. Memories without her. Learn to have a good time on your own. Find friends to talk to, they at least won't lie to you.

There are a lot of women that like to have sex. Go find one. Don't start another relationship, just meet people and get back to being you. I was bent out of shape at first too, but you know what, I'm having fun and making the best of it. Stop thinking about her, focus on you.

Verbiage · 02-22-2016, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by M3 Number 86

with a girl like that you can't take risks. Not sure if colgate gets rid of dick.

What about Holy Water?

jtodd_fl · 02-22-2016, 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

What about Holy Water?

If Holy Water could eradicate the signs of dick intrusion, the Catholic Church would be in a lot better shape right now.

Verbiage · 02-22-2016, 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtodd_fl

If Holy Water could eradicate the signs of dick intrusion, the Catholic Church would be in a lot better shape right now.

That, or the altar boys would be more spritely.

upstatedoc · 02-22-2016, 02:05 PM

OP, you're not going to listen to one thing we say are you..

02-22-2016, 12:33 PM	#134
yas_e92 Private 12 Rep 79 Posts Drives: F82 m4 E92 335 Join Date: Sep 2014 Location: IL > TX iTrader: (0) Garage List 2011 e92 335xi M-Sport [0.00]	bro youll do so much better without her. youll find someone that'll actually care for you and not go running off to other dudes when the smallest thing goes wrong. you'll meet someone LOYAL. you keep thinking about who shes on a date with? lol shes probably cheating on that dude too man.. deff seen more guys trying to oppress their partner restricting them from engaging in any kind of activity with other genders. In your situation probably cause she cheated on you... but this deff drives them away they need some space. Theres places in the word where its the LAW to marry two females because there are way too many females... i think you can find another ONE
	Appreciate 1 Quote

02-22-2016, 12:59 PM	#137
Verbiage Dismembered Member 3613 Rep 9,213 Posts Drives: F80 ZCP 6MT, R55 Clubman S 6MT Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: DMV iTrader: (6)	Did you ever tell her that you didn't like talking on the phone so often? Communication, communication, communication.....pun intended. __________________ My delivery experience and beach photoshoot here.
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02-22-2016, 01:38 PM	#147
CANGRKE70 ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ 816 Rep 172 Posts Drives: 2012 BMW X5 Join Date: May 2015 Location: Toronto iTrader: (0)	Hey OP, hang in there man. You've been in a relationship with this slag for 1.5 years on and off...so I'm going to make some assumptions here so bare with me... 1. You got comfortable fat. (maybe a pound here or there) Go to the gym...new chicks like nothing better than a fit guy and it's also a great way to release tension and promote endorphin release, which will make you feel better. 2. Your GF was a Ho, your friends kept telling you and you proceeded to still ditch them for said Ho. Time to reconnect. Ask your friends out to a bar. Apologize...buy them copious amounts of beers. The true friends will forgive you. 3. Go on a trip. Like a drug addict needs to change scenery to get away from bad influences and enablers you need to do the same. Where have you always wanted to go? Ask a friend to go with...if not go by yourself. Explore the shit out of that place, go to bar/club and get just let go of the negativity this "women" brought upon you. Hopefully you meet someone...Italy has so many hot women. 4. Cut her off like cancer. If you take her call, msg her back, check her social media you are going to start gravitating towards her. Lance that bitch off like a pus filled boil. She is toxic, has eaten more cock than a Kardashian and you shouldn't even spend another second of your life trying to mend a relationship that will never be there. Hope this helps. Best of luck man. __________________ Peter. Current Ride:2012 Alpine While BMW X5 35i Past Rides: 2005 Titanium Silver Metallic BMW X3 2005 Winning Blue Mica Mazda 3 1993 Milano Red Honda Prelude SR
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02-22-2016, 02:05 PM	#154
upstatedoc I'll get back to you 7569 Rep 2,132 Posts Drives: blue streak Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: not downstate iTrader: (2)	OP, you're not going to listen to one thing we say are you.. __________________ 2018 Stinger GT 2009 E90 N51 /Active Autowerke Stage 2 tune/BMW Performance Exhaust/ Countermeasure enthusiast.
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