06-16-2021, 07:09 AM | #9483 | |
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06-16-2021, 07:14 AM | #9484 | |
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I thought I was a good person but the way I react when people drive slowly in the left lane would suggest otherwise
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06-16-2021, 07:26 AM | #9485 | |
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06-16-2021, 07:45 AM | #9486 | |
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With all this being said, I'll just come right out with it. It would truly bother me as a man to know that my sweet loving wife, had been in bed with someone like me. Sex is sex, yes; but....well, let's just say I'm a bit different. I have no inhibitions, have no problems being vocal about what I want and well....some of the things I've done to those women and things they've done with me.....I should seriously write a book. The only conclusion that I am left with, is due to sheer numbers of these women (ages ranging in early 20's to mid to late 50's) and their eagerness to hop in bed with me and aforementioned acts performed, leaves me thinking that this is normal for these women. I imagine that after their week, to a month, of talking/coming to see me, that after it ended, they continued the same behavior with the other guys on the apps. Ladies and gents, I believe that we are all in agreeance that the ladies have no shortage of options on the dating apps. As referenced before, for ladies, it's a never-ending carousel of dick for them to choose from. Story time behind my opinion on this. A few years after deciding I was done with the dating apps, I ran into a girl, in the grocery store, that I had met on one of the apps. She was by herself, saw me, smiled, acted like she wanted to talk and then suddenly the biggest simp I think I've ever laid eyes on, comes up to her from behind, wrap his arms around her and kisses her on the cheek. I acted like I didn't know her and kept walking. It was at that point my conscience finally arrived. I felt terrible for that guy. That woman was/potentially still is, head over heels in love with her, but would he still be if he had any idea, not only things I did to her, but what about all the other guys??? I was not kind to her during the act. I wasn't mean, but she got violated and used. She was also a very sweet shy religious type girl with a self-proclaimed bad side....she had no idea how vanilla her bad side was until she met me. So my point is this, if the girl off the dating site gives it up easy, how many other guys before and after you, is she going to give it up that easy to? And did she give it up some guy that is a demon in the sack? Some the acts done with the ladies that I met off the apps are not acts that I would want to know someone had done to my endearing wife. Trust me. Their reactions at the time are indicative that they had never experienced such a thing. I was even told my many that no one had done anything like that to them. Reflecting on it now, there is sex that you have with your SO and then there is sex that you have with someone that means nothing to you (i.e. you don't give a shit about what they think after it's over). These women fall into that category. I somewhat feel awkward saying this, but I found that women loved being treated like a toy (this is the most polite way I can put it) during sex versus being treated with respect, which is what man would expect a woman to want. Not the case. All I have to go on in life are my personal experiences and the end results that I have witnessed. Again, I'm glad that I did not meet the current girlfriend on a dating site and glad she's never been on one. Crossing my fingers that this doesn't get seen. To touch on the point of the fine people on dating apps. There are tons of nice people on dating apps that have no other options of meeting people. I don't disagree with this, but from my experiences of dating apps.....people that make porn, need lessons is all I'll say |
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06-16-2021, 07:47 AM | #9487 | |
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06-16-2021, 08:10 AM | #9488 | |
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06-16-2021, 08:44 AM | #9489 | |
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06-16-2021, 09:09 AM | #9491 | |
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06-16-2021, 09:18 AM | #9492 | |
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06-16-2021, 09:28 AM | #9493 | |
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To answer your question directly, I found pictures that he or she took while in the act, so not only did I find out it happened, I saw photo evidence with two different people that I was friends with. A mindfuck indeed. I did not deal with it well. I was not the man that I am now back then. The morning that I saw the pictures in her phone, I woke her up and calmly explained that I went through her phone and I felt like there was nothing for us to discuss. I knew everything I needed and walked out the door. This was not the end for us though, it went on for another 2 years after. Extremely toxic relationship. It finally ended when she moved to England after marrying the guy she told me she was only pen pals with for 7 years. Before the current girlfriend, I dated this cute little brunette with freckles. We went on a few dates, I was a complete gentlemen with her. I later found out that she dated one of my co-workers. Normally I wouldn't have a problem with this, but the co-worker can barely spell his own name. I ended it with her the same day I found out that she actually dated this guy for a while. My thoughts on this were, if that guys mentality and attitude was good enough for her, then she was not on my level. |
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06-16-2021, 10:01 AM | #9494 |
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For better or worse, those things I see as 'she's with me now, so I'm the winner'... I'd be lying if I said that stopped them playing on my mind though.
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06-16-2021, 10:07 AM | #9495 | |
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You can only begin to actually get to know someone in person. How they really look, how they really sound, read their body language, etc. I felt sorry for my friends who were trying to date in covid, spending a lot of time online with someone only to finally get them to meet IRL and another person shows up. |
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06-16-2021, 10:31 AM | #9497 | |
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As for the mind-fuckery, even with the current girlfriend, my mind still gets the better of me. Every time I hear her fb messenger notification, it automatically makes me think it's another guy; even though she's given me absolutely no reason to think such a thing. Our minds always get the better of us....especially if you've already been through a traumatic experience concerning the same topic. |
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06-16-2021, 10:37 AM | #9498 | |
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06-16-2021, 10:39 AM | #9499 |
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Well put. My current situation is complicated to say the least. I'm working through some mental gymnastics that have entered the arena. I'm confident I can. This thread is actually therapeutic in some ways, so I appreciate everyone sharing to the degree that you do.
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06-16-2021, 10:40 AM | #9500 |
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This seems to be a thing with women. I've dated several that have tried to "get back at me" for dating someone I know. This only works if the guy did something to screw up and she did this as "revenge." Revenge never works though. The best revenge is to not care and go live life.
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06-16-2021, 10:43 AM | #9501 | |
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I'm kidding Sara. |
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06-16-2021, 10:58 AM | #9502 | |
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I appreciate the offer. I'm going to hold my cards to my chest, at least for now. I honestly don't need advice; logically I know what I should do, but logic doesn't always dictate real-life action when matters of the heart are involved. I'm sure many can relate. |
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06-16-2021, 11:05 AM | #9503 | |
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Im currently boo'd up and she has her own issues (not like a thing about her past, but baggage she carries with her because of it) and its annoying as all fuck. But sometimes that shit just hits too good, you know. So were kind of in that cycle where she throws an asinine fit, I just go dark, she comes back and makes up for it, rinse and repeat. I did get some separation and met up with a few only to quickly realize they were going to be carrying their own, but didnt have her upsides, so I let her back in. Thankfully its nothing really bad, its not like cops are getting called. I think dating at 40 is an odd place for a guy. In my shoes Im a valuable commodity, but youre either going young (which isnt really what I want) or youre trying to find someone your age who hasnt been burned so bad they are a mess. |
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06-16-2021, 11:58 AM | #9504 | |
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