The joke thread, pics are not necessary

vreihen16 · 05-11-2024, 05:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KRS_SN

The man who invented cats' eyes got the idea when he saw the eyes of a cat in his headlights. If the cat had been going the other way, he would have invented the pencil sharpener.

101 Uses For a Dead Simon Bond, anyone?????

KRS_SN · 05-11-2024, 05:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vreihen16

101 Uses For a Dead Simon Bond, anyone?????

Had to Google image search that... some real funny pics.

Llarry · 05-11-2024, 05:52 AM

Two men -- one older and one young -- are pushing their carts around the big box store when they collide.

The old guy says "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."

The young guy replies "That's okay. What a coincidence, I'm also looking for my wife. I can't find her and I'm getting a bit desperate."

The old guy says "Well, maybe I can help you find her. What does she look like?"

The young guy says "She's 27 years old, tall, red hair, blue eyes. Buxom and wearing no bra. She's got long legs and is wearing short shorts. What does your wife look like?"

The old guy responds, "Doesn't matter much -- let's look for yours."

Llarry · 05-13-2024, 05:21 PM

Karen was cleaning her husband Steve's rifle and accidently shot him. She calls 911.

Karen: "It's my husband! I've accidently shot him! I've killed him!"

911 Operator: "Please calm down, ma'am. Can you please make sure he's actually dead?"

Click...BANG!

Karen: "OK. I've done that. What now?"

05-11-2024, 05:52 AM	#1433
Llarry ///M driver 16552 Rep 499 Posts Drives: 2022 M3 6-speed Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Oregon iTrader: (0) Garage List 2021 Porsche Macan GTS [6.25] 2022 BMW M3 [9.40]	Two men -- one older and one young -- are pushing their carts around the big box store when they collide. The old guy says "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going." The young guy replies "That's okay. What a coincidence, I'm also looking for my wife. I can't find her and I'm getting a bit desperate." The old guy says "Well, maybe I can help you find her. What does she look like?" The young guy says "She's 27 years old, tall, red hair, blue eyes. Buxom and wearing no bra. She's got long legs and is wearing short shorts. What does your wife look like?" The old guy responds, "Doesn't matter much -- let's look for yours." __________________ '22 G80 M3 6-sp Portimao Blue/Tartufo
	Appreciate 8 murderspice702.00 Buug95917910.00 CamasM3e933218.00 2000cs3522.00 Esteban44450.50 Pauly Wauly2477.00 shannon1644.00 Soul_Glo13381.50 Quote

05-13-2024, 05:21 PM	#1434
Llarry ///M driver 16552 Rep 499 Posts Drives: 2022 M3 6-speed Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Oregon iTrader: (0) Garage List 2021 Porsche Macan GTS [6.25] 2022 BMW M3 [9.40]	Karen was cleaning her husband Steve's rifle and accidently shot him. She calls 911. Karen: "It's my husband! I've accidently shot him! I've killed him!" 911 Operator: "Please calm down, ma'am. Can you please make sure he's actually dead?" Click...BANG! Karen: "OK. I've done that. What now?" __________________ '22 G80 M3 6-sp Portimao Blue/Tartufo
	Appreciate 8 Esteban44450.50 Buug95917910.00 murderspice702.00 CamasM3e933218.00 KRS_SN13698.00 vreihen1615488.50 Pauly Wauly2477.00 Soul_Glo13381.50 Quote